


Choices

by eggmacguffin



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Friendship, Gen, Kitagawa Daiichi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-30 19:50:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6437968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eggmacguffin/pseuds/eggmacguffin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three boys who broke each other's hearts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Choices

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic in this fandom. My first fic on this site lol  
> title from a mumford & sons song bc i'm Lame

Kageyama Tobio just didn’t get that they weren’t as good as him. He thought that the stronger he was, the stronger they would be and couldn’t accept that they just weren’t fast enough. He thought they weren’t trying. So he just worked to get even stronger, because if he was as strong as Oikawa, they would jump for him, right?

He’d say, _you’re not even trying_ , but he’d mean, _why won’t you try when I’m trying so hard_

But Kindaichi Yuutarou was trying, because he always tries. When he started playing volleyball, he dreamed of being an ace. When he met Kageyama, when he first saw him play, he thought, _he and I can do this together_. But three years later and he _is_ an ace now, sort of, with kageyama as his setter, but he wasn’t good enough because _what kind of ace can’t even touch the ball?_

Kageyama called Kunimi _lazy_ , demanded to know  _why are you playing if you don’t even care._ And part of Kunimi could see that Kageyama was floundering, lost and desperate, but a bigger part was Kindaichi’s best friend and had to sit next to him as he cried quietly to himself on the bus ride home from matches, matches Kitagawa Daiichi had won but Kindaichi had lost.

Kunimi had to make a choice. and he chose his team. He whispered in their ears that Kageyama was cruel ( _which he was_ ), malicious ( _which he wasn’t_ ), and, since he won’t play with _them_ , maybe he’d rather play on a court by himself? So he called for a toss, and followed his team off the court, leaving his setter behind. He felt every tear Kageyama shed weigh heavy on his shoulders and tried very hard not to remember when they had called each other _Tobio_ and _Akira_. He made a choice, and he chose Yuutarou.

Then Kunimi and Kindaichi chose again: Seijoh.

Oikawa remembered them from Kitagawa Daiichi and, seeing how they had changed, grew furious. No one knew better than him what it was like to be suffocated by Kageyama’s skill and to run yourself ragged trying to keep up.

Kunimi didn’t think he’d let Kageyama get to him, but the first time Oikawa called his play style smart, not lazy but _smart_ , he felt his heart squeeze a little, and found himself smiling.

Kindaichi was harder. He was scared that if he wasn't good enough, if he couldn’t reach the ball, Oikawa would reject him entirely in favor of someone who could. It took a month and a half of gentle encouragement to get him to try spiking a quick again. His grin when it slammed past Matsukawa's block and into the floor was blinding.

Meanwhile, Kageyama chose Karasuno, as much as he had a choice.

Now he knew that the problem really _was_ that he wasn’t as good as Oikawa, but it was in a way he didn’t know how to fix. Maybe, at Karasuno, if he just keeps his head down and keeps his tosses slow, they’ll let him stand on the court with them.

But then this obnoxious little  _kid_ comes in and gets him kicked out of the volleyball club and picks fights with him and doesn’t know how to receive or serve and he’s _small but he can jump_ and he _trusts_ kageyama _so much_ even though they just met and Kageyama’s never really made a friend before, especially not in volleyball, but he thinks that might be what this is.

He learns, slowly. He has teammates who will talk to him and friends who will listen to him and senpai who will help him and realizes that he'd been standing on a court by himself for longer than he’d thought.

He sees his new teammates smiling on the court and thinks to himself, _what’s different here?_   Then in the practice match against Seijoh he sees Kunimi and Kindaichi smiling on the court and thinks, _oh_.

The match ends, and they are finally seeing at each other as they are. The hurt they have dealt and the history they share is still fresh, but the sting is not quite so potent, the pain not quite so raw, and the bleeding has finally stopped.

_Don’t apologize. I won’t apologize either._

Kindaichi is angry, with the outcome of the match and with Kageyama and with himself. But now, it makes him want to strive to get better, not struggle to keep up.

Kunimi feels relieved. As if this match and this team and that toss can maybe make up for the one he took from Kageyama in junior high, as if this one match can clear the minefield that lies between them.

It isn’t enough, but it’s a start.

When they meet again, in an official match, perhaps they can face one another simply as opponents, equal and opposite.

_And that’s why next time, we will definitely win!_

_In the next competition, as well, we are the ones who will win._

Kindaichi still doubts himself, Kunimi still blames himself, and Kageyama still has nightmares.

But they’re getting better.

**Author's Note:**

> So, should I keep writing for this fandom? kinda flying fast and loose with punctuation there lol. This isn't my usual style, so let me know if you think it works or not.


End file.
